REVENGE! Hooray!

Hello Occulties and Faithful Bloglings!

It’s me, your favorite occult mastermind…or at least I hope I am. 🙂 Today I want to discuss a super fun topic called… REVENGE! >:)

Yeah, well, I figured I would get this in before St. Patty’s Day when all of you are drunk and bleeping my cell phone at 4 in the a.m. to attempt to find a way to get back at that bastardly bartender that cut you off. At 4 in the a.m. on that day/night, Miss Cat will be HOPEFULLY be passed-out fast asleep next to the Fella after a night of drunken hedonism, so phooey, you will all need to consult my blog instead.

So here we are… What kind amusingly annoying havoc can we wreak in the lives of those who have wronged us? Ha ha! I have the answer… >:)

You will need:

Dead bugs of your choosing,
Red pepper,
Sulfur,
Salt,
A pin,
A pen,
A photograph of your enemy -or-
A small personal item of your enemy and a scrap of paper,
A bowl to mix stuff in,
Your toilet.

Clear a nice clean spot on your table. In your bowl crush up your dead bugs…preferably these should be bugs that have been nice and dead for awhile so that they are dry. Set aside.

Place the photo of your enemy in front of you (if you do not have a photo, place the paper in front of you.) Now write “Misery” across your enemy’s face nine times with your pen. If you are using a personal item, place this on the paper.

Place the crushed bugs in your palm and as you sprinkle them over your enemy’s image say, “XX, may you be plagued by insects, spiders, beetles and flies – may the children of these (name insect) plague you morning, noon, and night.”

Mix a pinch of sulphur, a pinch of salt, and a pinch of red pepper in your bowl, and pour these together in your hand. Holding these in your hand, envision your hatred of your enemy rising, flowing into the powders you are holding. Now pour the herbs in your hand over the image of your enemy while you say, “XX, burn, blister and writhe, choke upon the misery you have caused me every, morning, noon, and night.”

Now, folding the picture or paper AWAY from you, fold this into a packet, ensuring that as much of your powdered bugs and herbs stay within the packet. Take your pin, and stab the packet, so that the pin works to keep the packet shut.

Wait until you have to use the bathroom. When you need to go (one or two,) you have a choice… You may defecate/urinate upon the packet or toss it in afterwards, but when you are done, as you flush say, “XX, so do I flush away your happiness and career, into the sewer where it belongs. XX, just as you are s***, now may your life be s***.” Flush. Say “This spell will not reverse, nor place upon me any curse, as is my will – so mote it be.

Your enemy should suffer… Tho, generally, this charm has a working life of as long as it takes to disolve amongst the fecal matter. Enjoy your enemy’s misery.

I do not condone you cursing people who do not need to be cursed, but I know you want to anyways, and so… I take no responsibility for what harm you do to yourself or others with this curse.

Enjoy!

Blessings!

~Cat