Hey there kids,
Sorry for the delay on spell based articles. To say it's infuriating to type with three birds all over you is an understatement, ha ha. However you've waited too long, so in no particular order of importance, here are some of the most common reasons I see people ruin their love spells, often without intending to…
*Untreated Borderline Personality Disorder: Sadly, I see a lot of people come into my virtual office with such strong symptoms of this, that even I can tell it is the problem. If you often imagine scenarios that make you so upset you react to them as if they are real, if you are jealous of someone's ex from 25 years ago that they don't even talk to, or if you get mad if I'm three minutes late to our appointment, you probably should talk to someone regarding is it possible if you have BPD. In fact, if you tend to be clingy and insecure by nature, it wouldn't hurt to speak to a therapist as this disorder is VERY TREATABLE, HOWEVER, if you do not treat it, you will find your behavior often scares off the very people you want to keep close. 
This is very very common, or at least I do see it a lot in my own practice, so being as it's clearly widespread, it does not make you a freak or "crazy" to have this condition, but you will feel so much better if you get treatment for it!
You Think Social Media is Real/ You're Too Into Social Media: I can usually tell if a spell will fail by the number of updates which have to do with someone telling me about social media. There are even types of these updates which are worse than others. For example telling me you are stalking someone's social media and "Found Out" (note: you found out nothing, the person has more or less announced it,) whatever information, then you go on to compare it to what you "know" about that person's social media habits, then tell me this or that MUST mean (whatever thing you think you deduced,) which is in my experience very off base to begin with, I know you have much higher probability of spell failure than someone who tells me that their spell target liked a photo or something. Now, go ahead and make excuses for the stalking to yourself, but I assure you, you're the only one who will believe you, and in many many many many years of doing this work for others, most petitioners are too far gone with obsessive behaviors by the time they are using social media to "figure out" what's going on with their target. You can be as mad as you want for me saying it, but I'm being honest. Again, there are levels to this… I have a few exes of my own that would only contact me via social media, and I also understand that minimal movement could be noticed, it's more that these people scan whatever platform frequently to see what the target is doing. There's also a good reason I won't do readings for people who want to have a good cry about something they found out on social media…the more I can discourage self defeating behaviors, the better. I STRONGLY recommend a self imposed vacation from social media for 3-4 weeks if you're spellcasting. It can only help. If you were never that into it, you don't need to take a break usually, but if you're a daily user, you would be well advised to take a break. Nothing on there is real life, and frankly 99.9% of any audience anyone has on there will have forgotten what was posted in a very very brief time. Try moving away from believing social media is anything of substance – it won't just benefit your spell, it will also benefit your mental health as a whole.
You Believe that Anyone Offering Help/Advice For Free Is "On Your Side": People hate talking about your relationship which is exactly why you pay people to do so. So, if you're paying a therapist or spellcaster, that person is likely interested in helping as it's their job. Just offering you advice for free or involving themselves for free? That person almost definitely is not doing anything for your benefit. While I'm actually discussing mutual acquaintances you and your target have, unsurprisingly that free witch on TikTok who doesn't understand the four tenets of successful spellcasting (one of which is for you to KEEP SILENT,) is likely thinking the work to death with you while offering advice from a novice who is not even capable of casting a spell without entirely making it up from absolutely no experience or looking it up in a book. Try to keep people aware of your active spellwork to a bare minimum (it's fine to have a person other than your spellcaster to discuss it with, but don't have a group or several someones iin the loop,) if you really can't keep it to just between you and your spellcaster. Be wary of helpful mutual "friends" and always know anything you say or write may easily appear in a place your target could be aware of it.
You Use Dating Sites/Apps to find Long-Lasting Relationships: In over 20 years of these existing, the percentage of working relationships that I know of (and I fix relationships for a living, so I know of more relationships than most people,) that came off of a dating site or app is easily under 1%, but the amount of absolutely horrific dating stories which begin with "I met x on a dating app/site," is a huge percentage of "horrific dating stories" which the dates start from any source, being easily 60-75% of them. Statistically speaking, if you want a lasting relationship, you would first meet your partner through mutual friends. A side benefit of this is there are several murders and abusers that hang out on dating apps that you'd likely avoid as your friends probably would not set you up with a person best known for strangling their dates unconscious. It's not even that I'm old fashioned – my clients have proven this time and again, as have several of my friends…for most people, dating sites and apps are really only good if you're looking for a one night stand.
You Aren't "Marriage Material": This is less about being actually married or wanting to be married, and more that several people want a lasting relationship, yet do not act like someone most people would want to stay with. When I ask a client what they have to offer someone else, often I get "Well, I'm good looking, and I'm witty," – this is like saying "I have a cool shirt, and I made a funny joke once." It will get you nowhere. Do you have a career? Do you have your own home? Do you have any upper degrees (so at least a bachelor's degree in something?) and if no on the degrees do you have certification in any trade? Do you clean up after yourself/keep a clean home? Do you have a pleasant demeanor even under stress? Are you good with children? Why is it someone would spend their life with you and entrust their money and home to you? If it's that you're hot and funny sometimes all you have is enough for a quick fling. Love isn't enough on it's own to make a relationship work. Until you can make yourself a valuable partner, you will keep falling short and lose long term relationships.
You Lack a High- or Moderate- Social-Intelligence: I truly wish this was taught in schools…but then, I'd probably not have as much work if it were… It's fairly common, but many people just aren't socially adept, and mess up their relationships (romantic, platonic, and business relationships,) for this very reason. For example, you don't need the last word, silence IS a response, and stop apologizing so much would be things I would teach people which would benefit them greatly. 😛
You Wrongly Believe You Know What Your Intended Partner Thinks/Wants: One of the most obnoxious things people do is tell me this "Well, he likes stupid bimbos with fake boobs that laugh too much" or "She prefers rich, dumb, asshole types" – really? REALLY? So when your "beloved" (who is clearly a shallow knob in your view) brags to their friends about their current squeeze, they say "Wow, she has the fakest tits I ever saw" or "he's the richest most asshole man ever!" in your eyes? You are jealous, plain and simple, and you also do not have any clue what this person likes or wants in a mate if you really perceive it as so. While you may see no value in your rival, your intended does. Maybe they rescue injured wildlife, or maybe they always wanted to be a cardiologist and are studying to be one…whatever the reason, you clearly don't know it. Dispose of trying to figure out why they are dating your rival and keep working on getting that person attracted to you. This actually is related to….
You Don't Actually Love or Care for your "Beloved": If you want to cause pain to someone or destroy their life so you can have them, you actually no longer really love them, if you ever did at all. It's up to you if you want to continue trying to seduce them because at this point if you get them, you will tire of them in a few weeks. I see it all of the time.
You're Too Impatient: If you're crying about the lack of results in less than 2 weeks after a spell has been cast, you're definitely not someone who should be using magic to get anything.
Again, this isn't a finite list….but it's a nice opening for the love spell article I will be posting shortly. 🙂
~Cat
Cat’s Rants: Confessions of an Occult Mastermind 
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