Cat’s Rants: Confessions of an Occult Mastermind

Hi Occulties,

Today I’d like to discuss a topic which I feel is under-served when it comes to educating people in how to get love spells (and, really, any type of relationship-type magic, so even friendship and family/home spellwork,) to come together right. Because we all want a quick and easy answer, but that’s not always the best (or even sometimes the workable) option.

Let’s start by defining what I’m saying when I say Long-Term-Work or Quick-Workings as I am not defining this by the speed at which the spellwork manifests, albeit with long-term work, we are usually looking at a slower speed of manifestation. LONG-TERM-WORK is work that we will be performing on multiple days, usually for at least a week, whereas QUICK-WORKINGS are spells performed only once on a single day. LONG-TERM-WORK can also mean MULTIPLE-WORKINGS OVER MULTIPLE-DAYS AND WEEKS or even regular-workings, suchas a sweet jar that is worked on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays of every week until the desired end is achieved.

BOTH kinds of workings can be effective, but often when we have a very complex situation, especially one which has accrued a lot of damage over a period of time, we can’t just assume one fast and easy spell is a magical cure-all that will erase weeks, months, even sometimes years of damage. Also, sometimes a great deal of damage is done in a very brief window, so how long the situation has been falling apart may not really determine the amount of spellwork needed. What we need to keep in mind is the complexity of the issue, and the amount of damage, with length of time the issue has existed as being a secondary thought.

Let me give an example: A couple finds out that they are expecting a child when the relationship is already on shaky ground. They do love each other, but were already in a bad place when the pregnancy was discovered – but as they have been together for 2 years already, they decide to try to work on things and to have the child together. Unfortunately the pregnancy is not an easy one, and the mother-to-be is often on edge, and unpleasant and defensive towards the father. She is often sarcastic and puts him down. In turn, he begins to feel contempt for her as he struggles to support them. When the baby is born, the stress of caring for an infant who cries every few hours sends the couple over the edge, and they break up shortly after the birth. Within a few weeks, they both regret the decision, but both remember the relationship was in a bad place before the pregnancy. If one wants to repair this situation, how would we go about that?

Okay, for starters both sides are showing contempt. This is a very toxic thing to appear in any relationship. It will eat it from the inside out. Also, while I can certainly sympathize with how stressful it is for any woman to carry a child, the mother of the child has been very cruel and unkind to her partner for months – and notice, I say in my example, she lashes out at him for her feeling ill and stressed, not because he was being a knob (which I’m sure he occasionally was,) – which that’s a lot of damage to accrue. Humans often do not recognize the weight of our own actions on others.

So there’s a lot of damage here. If I just cast a quick reconciliation spell, that’s a bit like throwing a bandage on a broken leg. It might repair some of the damage (certainly bandages would help on the surface,) but the wounds here go pretty deep. We would almost definitely need to do multiple workings, – love drawing, communication, and, yes, long-term reconciliation and healing work. See, you need to view this relationship like a living thing. This is something which has been battered and bruised and nearly killed. It needs a lot of attention if we are going to be able to help it to survive and, perhaps, even thrive in the future.

Let’s try another example: A couple have been together for about 3 months. One of them begins to feel a bit panicked – she wasn’t ready to get into a real commitment, and she just feels smothered and unready, so she tells her partner she wants to end things, that it isn’t the right time, and she doesn’t want a commitment. Her partner isn’t ready to end things. How do we save this relationship?

This is the perfect opportunity for you to do a quick working. It’s very natural for people to panic around the end of what I term “the honeymoon phase” – when the veneer of infatuation starts to wear off, and that high of newness begins to come down, it is very normal to have more arguments or even have one of you break things off. That doesn’t make it hurt any less if someone does try to end things around this time. First and foremost, if you are the party seeking to reunite, please follow these instructions before you even cast a spell: DO NOT beg them to change their mind – you can say you don’t agree with that you should end things, but don’t make a scene if you can help yourself; DO NOT call them or text them relentlessly after they end things – try to go quiet; DO NOT ask mutual friends about them or talk to people who could and may report everything you say about them back to them. You will thank me later. 😉

In this situation, I’d recommend some obsession work, return to me work, or love work. You probably won’t require anything more than a simple working performed just once, and the ex should reach out shortly. And why? There really isn’t a lot of damage here. Most of the hurt was the hurt one of you got from being rejected. There aren’t any major arguments, – just someone getting a bit nervous of commitment. It’s very normal. While the rejection may hurt, it doesn’t mean you can’t fix this situation pretty easily….unless you panic and put a lot of damage on by acting crazy when the other person said you should end it.

DOES THIS MEAN ANY COMPLEX PROBLEM WILL NEED MULTIPLE WORKINGS? I would say the more damage there is, the more likely it is that the problem will best be fixed by multiple workings, but that doesn’t MANDATE that ALL complex problems are solved as such. Sometimes, this can even make the situation more difficult for the person working on the issue, especially if they are the petitioner (person for who the spells are cast on behalf of,) because they become even more attached and obsessed by the desired outcome, thus causing lust for results. I have worked with people who can barely manage having a single working done on their behalf without absolutely obsessing the damn work to death – and when they try getting longer term work done, they only become worse. So, in those cases, the quick working is probably better, at least in the sense that they may let the situation and obsession go faster so it might work. However, the BEST case scenario is that this type of petitioner wouldn’t know you were working on them at all (I guess making them more of a target than a petitioner,) as their anxiety and obsession is often so great that they derail any working done for them that they are knowledgeable about (and trust me, while this isn’t most petitioners, I’ve had occasion to meet a handful of people like this and this is an incredibly unhealthy level of anxiety and obsession, so probably you do not qualify as this person. I say this as I know I’ll get several people scared by saying there is a type of person that things often don’t work for, and they will be worried they are that type.) Further, many neophyte and casual spellcasters lack the dedication to continuously work the same spell. The amount of times I’ve heard someone couldn’t be bothered to do all the days in saying a novena of all things (a nine day prayer) is not small. And it is just that – they forgot, or it became “inconvenient” – and while that’s certainly not a professional worker saying those sorts of things, it’s important to be honest with yourself. If you’re only going to be able to do a working once or else you risk losing focus for the rest of the required days, a single spell worked over many days is probably not the best choice for you to try.

BUT that doesn’t impede the….less-dedicated and the beginner from doing MULTIPLE WORKINGS on the same target (or towards the same end,) because long-term work on an issue can mean using multiple one night spells on the same issue. Instead of dedicating yourself to working the same spell for, say, seven days (which really does strengthen that spell a great deal,) you could, for example, do several simple candle spells over the course of several weeks. This actually is very common for beginners to use this method, and with very good results. No one said you have to take on more than you are ready for if you haven’t come to the point in your own spellcasting journey where you are comfortable with more grandiose workings or long term workings. So, don’t think you need to wait for that single spell to manifest before you start another working on the issue. I personally find that doing a few workings on the same target often creates a faster and stronger result. So, even beginners can do long term work merely by doing several spells on the same issue without needing to know how to do more advanced work, and get a good result.

Let’s be realistic – many problems, when it comes to love, ARE NOT SIMPLE. We accrued that damage over a long time, or we made a lot of damage (and pretty bad damage,) in a short time (or even both.) So, most of the time, when we work a love issue, it’s not going to be a quick fix, but that doesn’t make it impossible.

As I often say, you need to approach this much like a medical issue. If I show up with multiple traumatic injuries to my body, you can’t just set my leg, or just stitch one of many wounds closed, then ignore all the other issues, and say I’m all fixed up, can you? You need to treat the whole person. And with love magic, we need to treat the whole problem if we can. If we leave part of it to heal or change on it’s own, that may work out for us, or it may derail results. So when we choose cheap, quick, and/or fast work and only attend to one small area, – either for budget restraints, or perhaps the hubris of the novice caster, we often don’t get the desired result…and this is why I recommend long term spellwork in many cases when it comes to love.

Certainly not all cases – because we also can overcomplicate an issue when our emotions are involved, – and sometimes you just need a little nudge to set things back on course to where you want them to be again. BUT, realistically, if it’s a very damaged, broken situation, you may need long term work.

I hope that was educational. Love spellwork coming in shortly. 🙂

There will be questions, so please ask!

~Cat