Cat’s Rants: Confessions of an Occult Mastermind

Everything you ever wanted to know about Hoodoo, Rootwork, or the Occult! The internet’s longest running occult blog, established 2004

  • Overdue mailings are going out NEXT WEEK. Sorry for the delay. I am globally answering “reminders” with this post. I would prefer to leave it at that but if you really wanna know why, by all means send another “reminder.” You know I love reminders about things I didn’t forget. :X

    ~C

  • Hello Occulties,

    Its not that I posted the article prior to this without some idea that it might offend people. As I’m sure all of us know, people are offended by bodily functions. This is why we are taught to supress farts and burps in public, and to do our eliminatings of waste in a private manner. Indeed, I knew some people would say “how awful that woman is,” or as some moe-moes who think I didn’t know they were talking about me on a message board might say “The redhead who does not like to be named really was taking too much space up discussing the use of a naughty item in spellwork.”

    However, color me surprised to get this cherry of an email. The author (who will not be named, just like the redhead writing this article for ya,) is in italics, and my replies are in the regular type.

    Dear disgusting bitch,

    Oh, please, call me Cat. πŸ™‚

    You know I’ve put up with alot [sic] of having to deal with your gross talk of body fluids because you have some good informasion [sic] on your site.

    Yes, I imagine the discussion of things like penises and vaginas and genital secretions is difficult on most people, thus why porn is so unpopular…still, thank you for soldiering on, just to do ME the favor of reading my site.

    Today I was so grossed out by what you had to say. You talked about things which obviously exite [sic] you alot. [sic] I bet you are a fecal freak because only someone who is exited by feces as much as you are would write something like that.

    I can’t say that those things are exiting me more than once a day or so, so I’m not sure if that defines that feces exits me a lot…according to my doctor, I should have it exit me about once a day on average. Still, thinking back on times when I did have it exit me a lot (a particular memory post-consumption of habenero jack cheese reminds me of a very bad 15 minutes of my life,) I was actually less encouraged to write anything at that moment than perhaps in any time of my life. I’m afraid I’ll have to disagree with you on that point.

    Maybe there is some historical backround [sic] to this sort of thing, but no one wants to hear it or know! I am never going to read your blog agian! [sic] You made me throw up!

    Yeah…that warning in the title didn’t give you enough information to make the decision not to read the article, huh? And um, actually obviously SOMEONE wanted to read about it, because as I detailed in the first paragraph, it was a request made by a reader to write that article …a challenge to be more accurate.

    However, since your NEVER GONNA READ MY BLOG AGAIN, I guess you will never know that I answered your complaint, and that I let you know just how deeply I’m concerned by you taking offense at me discussing a topic you feel is distateful. Goodness forbid I offend your delicate sensibilities.

    Love,

    ~Cat

  • Hello my dear Occultey-friends!

    Alrightey, one of my dear readers has challenged me to actually post traditional Hoodoo spells that use feces. Not being coprophagiac…or in any way enamored of poo (I really don’t like poop at all, frankly, and would entirely give up pooping if that wouldn’t cause me to explode from it building up,) I guess my dear reader thought I could not rise to the challenge. Fret not, dear ones. Just because your friend Cat would not be very apt to steal the poo of others, or grab a toilet snake of her own for Hoodooing purposes does not mean that I do not know of Hoodoo-poo-spells.

    So, if you’re easily disgusted, please excuse yourself from my brief glance at feces as a spell ingredient in Hoodoo. πŸ™‚

    The first question I am asked when the poo question arises (and people have heard of traditional Hoodoo spells with fecal matter in them,) is “How on earth do I get ahold of another person’s feces!?” Well, in the olden days, we did not have these classy flushing toilets we have today, and this was far easier than you might think. People pooped outside…sometimes in a woods or field, and we just had to hide and wait for them to leave their waste; or…perhaps they had one of the outhouses where they used a “Pan” system rather than a trench system, and you just had to wait for them to enter the old outhouse with the newspaper, leave, and grab the pan, or perhaps the bomb you sought was in a chamber pot…there were so many ways to gather it back in the day, which is why poop is part of Hoodoo’s history (not kidding, it really is.)

    740PX-~1 Then people ask “How could I get someone’s feces for spells in this day and age?” While I really don’t want to answer or know why you wanna know, I would throw out that perhaps you could get this by telling people your toilet is broken the same night you feed them some habanero chili dinner (?) or wait until they are camping (?) or…figure it out on your own. Quite frankly, I am not interested in helping you harvest human feces in the modern age. (I never thought I’d write such a thing but I stand by that sentence.)

    Since most people are also not interested in handling other people’s poop (thank goodness,) we shall move on to the interesting stuff about poop in spellcraft instead.

    For example, what are human feces generally used for? Well, the most common I can think of is to use this bio item as a means of cursing someone to have their bowels block up, ultimately killing them… As taken from the Hyatt transcripts (this is quoted directly, and is not intended BY ME to be racist. This is how Hyatt transcribed it. I apologize to everyone it may offend. This was, unfortunately, common practice when these transcripts were published. Hyatt’s replies to the informant will be in parentheses, and the number of the informant in brackets.):

    Well, a person go to dereself – yo’ know, lavatory, anything like dey go out. It’s not like – yo’ know we have toilets now, yo’ know, to flush; but befo’ dat if a person go out to do a job or anything, dey take dat an’ go to a tree, an’ take a auger an’ bo’ yo’ a hole in de tree, an’ put it in de tree an’ take yo’ a peg an’ drive it in dere tight. An’ every mornin’ fo’ nine mornin’s go dere an’ tap it one lick, an’ de ninth mornin’ dat dey tap it dey’ll die, cause it will lock dere bowels an’ dere ain’t nobody kin open dem.

    [St. Petersburg, FL; Informant #1053; C126:10-C134:6 = 1707:10-1714:6.]

    ****

    Note “litter” and “hockey” is the feces in this entry.

    Dey fixed a girl once in Edenton, North Car’lina. Her father come to me and she was near about dead. She couldn’t have a passage. The doctor couldn’t get nothing through her. So he (the father) come to me and I set right down and looked in my cups and read, and I told him, I said, “A man have got her litter and put it in a tree (in a hole in the tree) and he’ll go to it every morning and knock that fir peg up,” and I said, “the last day he knock it up, she gonna die.” But I said, “I am gonna tell you what chah do.” I say, “You git up tomorrow morning at three o’clock and you watch and you’ll see him come by your house wit a ax on his shoulder,” and I say, “he’ll stop at your gate and say something – mumble something, but when you [he] go, you follow him.”

    And I says, “Then you’ll hear ‘im what he says.” I says, “As he knock, he say, ‘Go, go Goddamn yuh. Go, Goddam yuh.”I say, “He’ll knock on there nine times, and then,” I says, “when he gits through, you draw your gun on him and make him cut the tree down and,” I say, “your daughter will git up.” He did it and I cured de girl – got de litter out. They kin take your hair and put it in de tree and do de same thing. Dey kin take your hockey and put it in a tree and kill you just the same.

    (How long ago did that happen? That this girl was hurt that way? How many years ago did that happen?)

    That’s been about three years ago.

    (Down in Edenton?)

    Yes.

    [Berkly, VA; Informant #494A; Name – Mrs. Griffin (now in Berkly, VA; from Bertie Co., NC); Numbers Book 422-621; Cylinders 533:2 – 536:5.]

    ****

    And our last offering with Hyatt transcript quotes…. This one isn’t to so much BLOCK the bowels, but to enflame them unto to death. Note – “passage” is feces here.

    Well, yo’ see, yo’ take a person’s passage an’ yo’ take dey names – if it’s a white person, yo’ take white papah an’ red ink; a colored person, yo’take brown papah an’ black ink. Yo’ write dat party’s name all kinda ways jis’ all ovah a square piece
    of papah an’ yo’ write dere name all kinda ways, nine times. An’ yo’ take dat passage an’ yo’ put cayenne peppah an’ yo’ put black peppah – fo’ a white person yo’ put white peppah. Yo’ take war powdah an’ yo’ take war vinegar – war vinegah an’ war powdah. Yo’ take devil’s-shoestring an’ devil dust. Yo’ place all dat into dat. Yo’ take fightin’ peppah, fightin’ vinegah.

    Yo’ put all dat into dat passage an’ yo’ take dat passage an’ yo’ wrap it up wit black thread – see, if it’s a white person, yo’ put it in a white papah, a big piece of white papah, an’ yo’ wrap it up an’ yo’ tie it an’ wrap it wit a whole spool of white thread; if it’s a colored person, yo’ git a large piece of brown papah an’ yo’ wrap it up lak a package an’ yo’ wrap it wit a whole spool of black thread, see.

    But whilst yo’ wrappin’ dat package, yo’ wrap 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9, yo’ see, a’ yo’ wrap dat nine times each time. Den yo’ wrap dat whole spool of thread an’ ever’ time yo’ make it nine wraps, yo’ make de wish whut chew want done to dat, yo’ see. Yo’ make dat wish each time yo’ wrap, ever’ nine wraps. Wrap dat package.

    Yo’ take dat package an’ yo’ bury it, see. Yo’ bury dat package.Now, when dat package is buried undah de ground, well, dis passage dries up, see. Dis passage, it’s buried, yo’ see, an’ while it’s buried all dis stuff is gonna commence tuh workin’ up. Ever’thing in dere is hot, it’s gonna commence tuh workin’ up, see.

    Now, dis party is gonna start tuh runnin’ roun’ like a wild person.
    He’s goin’ crazy. Now, he goin’ crazy, an’ when dis dries up – dis passage,
    when it dry up, dis person will pass out.

    (That kills them.)

    Yessuh.

    [Algiers, LA; Informant #1583 – Nahnee the “Boss of Algiers”; Cylinders
    E94:2-E119:1 = 2927-2952

    ****

    I tried to hit on the more interesting Hyatt passages regarding human feces and killing but that’s the tip of the floater (pun entirely intended) insofar as the many spells which are similar in nature to the above. There is a whole catalog of killing using your target’s feces as an ingredient. Now, I think (or at least hope,) we’re all intelligent enough to see a pattern emerging here – the feces are being used as a witness sample or bio item that effects the bowels (not a huge stretch if you think of it.) I’m sure if you wanted to kill someone, you must hate them enough that handling a little of their poo would not be a big deal to you? Well, I guess I’ll leave that up to those who are interested in doing such a thing.

    The most common “blocking up the bowels” Hoodoo spells that use a target’s feces which I know of will loosely follow these instructions: obtain your enemies feces, bore a hole into a tree (sometimes the type is specified, other times it is not,) and take a dowel rod or a peg and over a certain course of days (generally 9) each…specific time of day (this is usually around dawn, but I have seen spells say before sunrise, at midnight, and once or twice at like 3am) generally while cussing the person out or commanding they drop dead, you drive the peg in a measure, on the final day (again, usually the ninth,) driving the peg in entirely.

    The most common “enflaming the bowels to death” spells using the target’s feces whcih I know of generally will say to obtain the the feces and mix with some form of pepper, then also often salt, graveyard dirt, goofer dust, etc are also added. Sometimes even powdered scorpions are recommended. The enflamed bowels one do generally want the feces to be stored where it will dry, but not always.

    But now, is Hoodoo-poo-spellwork solely focused on harvesting the poop of others to kill them with their own feces? Oh, no, of course not. As I said, I am barely touching on just even that whole school of spells…just trying to educate you on more common ritual uses, and we’ve not even gotten into some of the things we can do with YOUR POO (yes, your very own bowel movememnts,) because your poop can also be used.

    IMG_1194 Now this next cherry is one someone had told me years ago on an email group. I cannot vouch for its authenticity but…don’t gag, I was told he had heard of a spell where a woman was to swallow three peanuts whole, and when she excreted these peanuts in her bowel movements, to pick them out of her poop, and feed them to her lover (hopefully by hiding them in his food and not by just forking them over in their smelly state,) and he would be hers forever. Please don’t feed anyone, especially someone you love, bacteria-ridden poo-nuts, okay? πŸ˜‰ Seriously, that screams staph-infection, kiddos. I present it only for educational purposes only. But see, there is using your own poo (or at least digestive system,) for a purpose other than to harm (though if someone fed me a pooped peanut, I would consider that trying to harm me.)

    Still, the use of human feces is rarely romantic in nature (another thing I never thought I’d say or write,) when it comes to spells – no, its not even usually a positive thing.

    See, in modern times, when people use their own feces, this is done to harm. Some of you may have seen me post this (another male rootworker posted it to his board calling me a “female rootworker,” – thus why I won’t bother crediting him with more credit than was given to me, – so you may recognize it from his board as well,) where the toilet and poop is used to harm an enemy. Basically, you want to wait until you’ve been partying like a rockstar or eating lots of Taco Bell or just have something utterly nasty you need to sit down to get out, but (should this not be possible,) just having to go to a number two will do. Bring a marker (black preferably,) with you into the bathroom, and write your target’s name on the toilet paper you are about to use. I have, in the past, done this with a single just writing of the name, but also have really “dressed it up” (as much as one can dress up a pooping spell,) and written the name of the target nine times, and then crossed it with “your life turns to shit” nine times like a name paper (I had awhile before I had to go that day.) Its up to you what you wanna do with the name. You know, there are even services to get pictures printed on a roll of toilet paper, so you could get really “fancy” and get your enemy’s face on your teepee. Anyhow, while you sit and do your business, focus intently on your target (not like, by having them in the john with you, I mean just mentally focus,) and see their life falling apart…see this sort of like its the poop coming out of you (gross, right,) and when you’ve finished, as you wipe your bottom with your named toilet paper, you say “(full name of target,) just as I cover you with sh*t, so your life turns to sh*t,” or something along those lines. Again, feel free to be creative with what you want to say as long as its in the postive (doesn’t use no, not, never) and present tense. Then just flush. Poospell complete.

    Now, as you’ve noticed the above “spell” has many ways you can make it your own. I want to say I’m borrowing from Draja Mickaharic here when I offer this alteration, yet, I seem to remember he had this sans toilet and sans poo…just the rice paper part was something he’d used. Basically, you can write out your name paper on some rice paper suchas I’d mentioned above, and then as you do your morning business in the bathroom (a one and a two would be fine,) be sure to toss in your enemy’s rice paper name paper in the potty before you do, and then do your business all over it.

    IMG_1195 So, in the words of Austin Powers, “Who does Number Two work for?” Its you, baby, its you!

    But humor aside (we all knew that I could not complete this post without humor, hehe,) this post has barely touched the use of human feces in Hoodoo, IMHO. And furthermore, there are uses for all sorts of animal poops you can use in Hoodoo spells (did you know that your dog’s excrement could actually be a ritual item? Oh yeah,) but the animal poops would make for a lengthy discussion here indeed, when, quite honestly, the majority of this post was meant to educate you more than encourage you to go harvesting the excrement of things around you. If you really are a fecal freak, then maybe you should study more on the use of feces in Hoodoo (and other paradigms,) on your own. As for me, I’m all crapped out on the topic for the time being.

    I do hope its been educational.

    ~Cat

    Exerpts from Harry M. Hyatt’s “Hoodoo – Conjuration – Witchcraft – Rootwork” have been used for educational purposes. These books are currently out of print (or so I am told,) but if you would like to examine them further, please consider joining the HyattSpells yahoogroup.

    The picture of horse with horseshit are courtesy GNU project

    All other content and pictures of this article are copyright 2009 OriginalNinjaCat.com and may not be copied, pasted, or used without the permission of the author.

    What happens if you steal, copy, plagiarize or in some way infringe on my copyright? Click here to find out!

  • Hey everyone,

    Just to let everyone know, I’ve been working to put up SEVERAL articles (no less than 8, hopefully more,) prior to my Holiday Vacation. πŸ™‚ There will be articles on technique, spell-articles for cursing, controlling, love, and money spells, so if you have any particular requests outside of that, please let me know now. Unfortunately, when my sister’s family imposes on me, 2 toddlers screaming and trashing my home will make it near-impossible to write any articles until they have left.

    In business news, I WILL NOT be accepting any requests for new work after Dec 21, 2009 until January 4th 2010. Please get all requests for new work in NOW, and especially NOW because I’m going to be changing the business site around (we all hate the business site because its no fun, and the blog here has started to work too much as my business site which I never wanted it to,) and I will be making some changes to the business as well…and your wallet will be better served if you make your purchases before the changes, as right now I can’t live off of the earnings I make, so…I’m raising prices, and not just by $5 or something like I usually do. πŸ˜‰ I figured a few weeks’ warning will hopefully be enough for some people. πŸ˜‰

    Thanks everyone for reading, and I hope to get the first of the new posts up tonight. πŸ˜€

    ~C

  • IMG_1186

    I sure was a cutie patootie, wasn’t I? – come to think of it, the drooling problem never has ceased, though now it must be triggered by things like half-naked pictures of Christian Bale or a sign that says “Free Stoli.” I also think I’m going to have that pot belly again in another decade (let’s hope not.)

    Thanks everyone for your birthday wishes!!!

    ~Cat

  • Constantly asking practitioners for substitutes is sometimes a bit ridiculous. πŸ˜‰ Check the spell you want to cast and if one of the ingredients seem pretty important, and you, for whatever reason, cannot get ahold of it, try picking a different spell. I can’t count the number of times someone said “What can I substitute for x” when the “x” they wanted to sub was likes asking me “What can I substitute for meat when I’m making a meat loaf?” or “Is there a sub for flour in this bread?” πŸ˜‰

    Furthermore, while this is not always true, more oft than not, getting a certain ingredient is just a matter of making some effort to get it, and not any impossibility. If it really just means you have to problem solve to get the ingredient, then I recommend using that grey matter in your head (remember that brain thing? Its, like, good for thinking on your own, and like figuring stuff out on your own using logic and stuff like that?) to problem solve as to how you’re going to get the ingredient. πŸ˜‰

  • Hey everyone,

    I’ve had a few ambitious ideas in mind (several in fact – I wish I had this cool thing known as free time sometimes,) and had thought of putting together a few PDF’s of the blog, namely a love & recon collection, other spells collection (everything but the luv,) and maybe the big spell book with both – and all of these in PDF form, and for sale. Why for sale? Jeez, its here for free, and all, but you actually have to make an effort, and making an effort to work in the least is a big hassle for many people. πŸ˜‰ I mean, goodness forbid we have to take on my archives, right? πŸ˜‰

    Would people be interested in purchasing these collections? Please let me know if this has a market, or if you have other suggestions, and I will see if I can’t find some time between eating, sleeping, and working to fit in making up a PDF book of collected spells. πŸ™‚

    ~C

  • If you’re keeping a spell journal or spell record, note the weather in your record. You may find your spells have a better effect during different types of weather. For example, I used to have a target who when I cast a spell on that person during a windy time, the spellwork would manifest 3 times as fast. I have also known spellcasters who are very effective during lightning storms…and how do you know which weather seems to follow better success with your spellwork? By keeping a spell-journal. πŸ™‚

    ~Cat

    Copyright OriginalNinjaCat.com, all rights reserved. No copying. πŸ™‚

  • There are just so many jokes I could say, that I will leave this at I found this in the supermarket (its a real product) and I can’t be the only one thinking these resemble something.

    IMG_1117

  • Hello my fellow Rooties and Readers,

    I was wondering if any of you had some feeling on the issues of people who don’t read your FAQ and consistantly ask questions (sometimes the same person repetitively doing so,) that are answered in the FAQ? Do you get this a lot? Do you find you have problems where you’re often repeating things you answered in a Frequently Asked Questions section, or that you’ve discussed on any sort of public site or page of yours because people are either too lackadaisical to read this or are…I don’t know just ignorant such a thing exists? Maybe they’re hoping the answer won’t apply to them?

    Am I the only person who spends at least 2 hours every day writing the exact same things? I mean seriously, I have written on the exact same 2 topics for 2 hours AT LEAST on every single day of my breathing waking life – excluding the rare holiday, weekend, or time off I may have, – for at least the last 4 years.

    Why am I asking this? In the last 2-3 days I have repeatedly gone over the same 2 questions to a greater degree than I do on average, PLUS, as we all know I write a lot about not obsessing your spell down to nil and letting the energy do its work, and apparently I have a whole bunch of folks who seem to think I never wrote a stitch on the topic… Am I alone here? Am I the only person who has five years of information posted online for free for everyone, plus an entire catagory devoted to questions people ask me, plus 2 FAQ’s, and a ginormous truckload of spells that span more space than most books on the topic, plus varied articles on practice and technique who has to repeat myself on a daily basis?

    I really sincerely want to know. For a long time I have presumed people are just incredibly lazy, or can’t be bothered to do any research, but really…is it like 9 out of every 10 people is that way? Or is that just the ones I get to meet?

    Please let me know your input.

    And for all my readers who may have found that insulting, well… Its not meant to insult you, but imagine how I feel leaving all this fantastic information up for your education, only to find myself answering questions that are often answered right on the first page of my blog…I feel bad and a little insulted. πŸ˜‰ So, don’t be insulted – its not uncommon for me to deal with that sort of thing daily, I’m just curious as to the experiences of my peers on this.

    ~Cat